yum

Sometimes I think the best and only solution to sleepy-head and sadness is COFFEE. And maybe Chocolate. Hopefully this will help? PLEASE! Because I seriously am in need of a pick-me-up. *Downing cup #2 now*

Current mood - overwhelmed.

Current mood - overwhelmed. Period. Seriously, I don't know how the last couple of days have happened. I don't know how the next few will. I'm finding that a lot of things that I never would have expected to happen can IN FACT happen and will. This is totally out of my control, and I kind of find some strange comfort in that. These things have both been of the good and of the bad - strangely enough. And I think for the first time in a long time, I am kind of OK with the fact that I was wrong. That's all for now - maybe I'll find some time later to get the rest of this junk out of my head. :D

This was right after my haircut-- you see the new bangs and the color. And you can see what I now realize are the hugest eyes ever. Gawd.

Ehh.. whatever

Although we really didn't do ANYTHING for our anniversary - and did NOT go on our little outting over the 3-day weekend that I had planned - it went alright. I'm just tired and glad that I had the extra day for the weekend. I'm exhausted, and really there's no reason. The one thing I did accomplish was reading one of the Hot romance/paranormal books Candy's mom let me borrow. On book #5 now. Wow. I think that is why I'm in such a funk about how borring my life is, nothing can compare to hot, sexy fiction. Good thing there's only one more book in this series, and then maybe I'll feel better about my life. Notice how it's NOT inspiring me to work on livening things up on my own. I am just waiting on forgetting that romance and all that BS exists. I did make an attempt or two, so not all hope is lost. I cut and colored my hair Friday, and Zach and I did have a little romantic/date time yesterday.

At least I am working on being a little more creative. I need to do something with my hands and keep myself busy. Since Denny and Candy are getting MARRIED, I'm going to make them a queen-size afghan. I'm excited about buying more yarn. It's been SO long. It's a really fun heart cable pattern, and I'll post pictures when I get some squares done.

Speaking of pictures, I have started taking more. I'll be posting them at least once a week. :D We'll see how that goes. I've got to take it easy on all the promises!

Until next time.. ciao!

New Monthly Ritual

So yesterday after work was my first massage in a reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally long time. :D YAY! I've only had one before this - years ago when a high school friend of mine was attending massage therapy school and needed to do more intern massage hours. And now I'm hooked. Seriously, I won't let myself do this every week, but at least once a month!!!

Hayley and I had been trying to plan this out for sometime, and when we bought the last office ladies birthday massage gift certificate, she and I threw in for a 3-pack of 1-hour massages at the Relax Station in Kingwood.
That has to be the best $40 you can spend on an hour. I was pretty relaxed from our margarita lunch and the second we had to kill time before our appointment, but after getting all the knots and kinks worked out of me for an hour, I was useless. She even found a spot in my back that when she massaged and pressed on the points, I swear my arms and hands lifted off the table. Oh and I've never had some one massage my face, but gosh, I'm glad that was first because I would have drooled all over the place if it was at the end. I was quasi-awake for the whole thing and in a perfect inbetween of conscious and unconscious, hot and cold. I need to plan the next one a little better because my body was complete jello after that. I was having to actually say out loud "OK leg, time to push foot on the brake." Ha ha.

And then I came home. Had dinner with Zach, Denny, and Candy.

Zach told me he didn't want to go anywhere for our anniversary thing Friday. He's an ass. He says he just wants to relax today and that going to Shiner and all that didn't really sound all that fun. So my plans are ruined and all I've gotten him was a card. Which I know is more than he probably has done for me. So we probably won't celebrate anything this weekend, and we probably won't need to ever celebrate anniversaries again. I got pissed off and just shut down. And went to bed.

I did however have the best night of sleep I've had in a long time. I jumped out of bed thinking I was late for work this morning, realized that I was taking a vacation day, and laid there for the next hour thinking if I should really just stay home or go in to work anyway. After I gave in and went back to sleep, I had that weird dream again where I won the lottery from a scratch off. Something like $6-8 billion but I'm always some one else and always doing something different right before I win. I always wake up after losing the ticket and searching for it before I go to Austin. The dream is pretty random, but happens every so often. The details are always a little fuzzy and different, but I always have a leather jacket, end up in a swimming pool, and lose the ticket for a portion of time. Strange.

Off to my day/weekend of probably nothing. *le sigh*

things I love.. things I hate

I love my friends. I have these relationships with people I'd never imagine would waltz in my file and make me laugh until I just might pee my pants. Some are family - some are better than family - some are almost family. And I wouldn't be able to think without them. I get a little lost and deflated here and there, and these are the people that bring me back to center and make me believe that I'm worth it. Now the thing I hate most about these people that I love so much - that sometimes they hurt and I can't fix it. :(

Whew.. is it over yet?

So I'm in such a freaking rush for this week to be over. I'm actually taking a day off and doing a little something something for myself and my Honey. Thursday my co-worker/friend and I are going in for an hour massage - granted we're going to have a spa day paid by the company in May, but we just can't wait that long. Then I'm taking Friday off and so is Zach. Sunday is our 7 year anniversary.

I've got it planned sorta. Well, I convinced both of us to plan a day off - together. Ha ha. And we've always wanted to visit the Shiner brewery. We've been to the local micro-brewery Saint Arnold's here once, but that's it. There's been a lot of beer consumed in our years of dating - and a good part of it has been Shiner, because it's Zach's favorite. So why the hell not?

Other than that, I've got nothing else, but a card. I can't remember a year where I just don't have anything really pulled together. I guess there's a first for everything? But I'm really out of ideas/inspiration, but really, I just don't have a clue.

I know that it probably isn't that big of a deal to anyone else but myself, but geez. You just get used to a certain way, and it's hard to break form.

Then again I do have a pretty bad habit of going over the top. Maybe this is just another one of those cases?

Either way, no matter what happens, Zach will know he's loved and I can't imagine the last and the next seven years without him. I'll just keep that in mind and keep working on something. :D Lucky seven. Doesn't that mean we've survived the 7-year itch?

Note to self: Need to watch that movie. Maybe this weekend!